Our Wild Blue Yonder

Make New Friends, But Keep the Old.........

2012-01-18T11:30:00.003+01:00

Military life does not allow for ruts. It designates zero degrees of stagnation. Always a changing dynamic, this life is always forcing adaptation. We are blessed in that we have given ourselves away so many times, and been given the hearts of so many over the years. Those hearts are treasured. I love, LOVE Facebook. It is the ONLY place that allows me to keep all my peeps in one place. I can get to them ALL in one click. I guess these days find me a little misty because we have only 2 more weeks with this squadron. That tenderness that gets pounded back every 2-3 years is showing itself again. I ponder how we are different since arriving here, amazed at how relationships and personalities change us.

This weekend gave us time rich in converation with dear ones, newly dear, and treasured for years. We had dinner with a new family over the weekend, the ones replacing us. These are new friends that we don't get to be with because we must journey on. We also had a breakfast date with current friends who found themselves in Germany five years ago, to support the military community. They've traveled with us along this difficult yet unforgettable path. They've prayed with us and for us and we've loved each other's kiddos, all 8 of them. And just the night before, I spent a lengthy phone conversation with a long lost friend. These 'old' ones, she and her husband, loved us long ago......in the B.C. era (before children). Our paths haven't crossed since that first tour as career options changed, yet, they are our destination, already stationed at our next assignment and helping us find a house. I trust them with my life.

A patchwork of sorts, is this life with a uniform. It is pieced together in odd, vibrant places and times. Shared laughter, and tears sew our hearts together, forever. Not all memories are pleasant. Strenuous and difficult days are stitched as well, but only add to the character chiseled from circumstances. We leave each assignment changed. Some tours leave us more battered and torn than others. This one has been a long road for us all. But the God of our hearts mends and purposes every stitch placed by the human hands we've come to know. We won't see the big picture of this memory quilt till Heaven. We can't see how each piece goes exactly where it should. I tell my young gals in the squadron, who are just beginning their quilts, the importance of taking care of each other. Our mending happens by those closest to our hearts. They can quietly sew, and understand. Some of my most treasured remnants and stitches were put there 20 years ago. I guard them.

My most precious souvenir of our military days is our imaginary quilt. Years from now, in a future not too distant, when the boxes are gone for good, and we sit on the porch in our 'forever house', we will reminisce and thank Him for this life, for this quilt to warm our hearts.

Still counting his gifts.....

34. a blue sky
35. German washer and dryer
36. sweet neighbors
37. jubilant birdsong
38. sibling laughter
39. city buses reminding me where we are
40. magic of Facebook
41. friends who 'just know'
42. laughter in the house
43. old jeans that give
44. clothes shed by growing ones
45. a meal with new friends
46. 8 kiddos' giggles
47. the unmatched joy of bacon
48. a brilliant starry sky unseen for months

Wait for It.........

2012-01-11T10:29:00.000+01:00

8:17 a.m.

I've waited long enough to take der hund on his morning tour du pee...

It's still so dark....and foggy...... again.

Pretty warm out. Don't need gloves. Should I take the camera?

Street lights glow on a back street. They quietly divert my mind from my restless night.

My racing, rambling mind runs questioningly this dark morning.

What if it's not enough? What if I'm not enough? What if I didn't push them enough to be enough?

Insecurities pounded back my sleep the night before, leaving me as hazy as my village.

This mama has often stood alone during this assignment. Keeping it all together, so everyone else can keep it all together. At times, the job of holding up the power lines gets tiring. Faltering is not an option. Prayer is.

We've had countless 'discussions' these last 30 months, He and I. Circumstances and simple geography have hindered my cultivation of deep human girly, mama, friendships. Farming relationships is just hard work. I think He planned it that way. I think He wanted to be my first and last resort for a time. To have me just to Himself. I think He wanted me to see a different side of Him.
He knows my 'mission' and my husband's to boot, though both are rarely talked about openly. Few understand. My mission is to train the kids' ears to hear from Him what their life's mission will be AND to support the man with a mission from the USAF.

The paths where He's led me on this tour were not where I would have journeyed. He knows my never ending capacity to want to see it all. To know. TO KNOW.

Lord, I need to KNOW!

"Oh baby, I'm thinking you really don't"

What happens when I KNOW? When there's no hazy horizon? When I can see for miles?

Ah, then I don't have to trust. My senses aren't pricked to His still small voice. I don't wonder at His ways, or Word. I don't feel His lap when I need His hug.

Yes, He knows me.
He also knows when I'm tired. When I need a glimpse. Just a little. Into tomorrow.

I'd been out there for an hour or so (or 30 months?) noticing the beauty of the simplicity JUST in front of me. That's all I could see. That's all I can see.

Then suddenly, the sky colors a little pink.

Through the thick, cloudy haze, how can that be a glow I see?

"Just stick with me baby! You can't see it right now, but the future is brilliant."

He gave me a glimpse. The horizon was still hazy. It IS still hazy.

What's just in front of me is clear. Down the path, not so much.

But His brilliance pales it all.

Clouds will always reside in the sky. Circumstances will hide Him sometimes.

Faith is knowing the sunrise happens whether we see it or not.

Still counting His gifts....

31. surprise sunrise captured
32. a yellow headed 9-year-old planning a birthday party
33. a husband, who's opposite personality blends with mine to make us complete

Fairy Tale in Rothenburg ob der Tauber

2012-01-09T15:22:00.000+01:00

Back in September, we trekked back to Munich and added the venue of Rothenburg to the end of our adventure. This little town is known around the world as 'the land that time forgot'. Since the Deutsch language has no 'th' sound, this village is pronounced RO - (long o) - TEN - BURG. It snatched my heart when we ventured onto its cobblestone streets and might I say it remains there. A princess, I was, transported back to a medieval genre with knights on their steeds.

Interesting note: The face on this tower gate is where boiling oil or tar was effectively poured on poor souls unlucky enough to be unwanted visitors of the township. The remnants of such still stain the stone.

My puny American brain can't fathom history of 1000 years, with no renovations. The simple reason for this was just economics. It began as a relatively wealthy walled city. Then, because war happened, several times over, the cobblestones remained in place, as its various owners were too poor to fix what needed fixing. Over time, say hundreds of years, disrepair morphs into 'charming'........and romantic.

Amazing village for the hopeless romantic........<sigh>......

Still counting His gifts.....

28. amazing lemon garlic salad vinegrette recipe

29. snack-size naval oranges in season

30. candles that warm up the room

Grey

2012-01-08T20:05:00.000+01:00

Rain. Clouds. Drizzle. Fog. Mist.
More clouds. More rain.

After living in the Eifel region of Germany for 2 1/2 years, I count myself an expert of these. I've talked a lot about such dreariness here in the blogosphere. I will never again take the sun for granted. I've learned how best to 'sunnify' my photos, as near 80% are free from natural light, unfortunately. This winter, so far, we've had NO snow to brighten up our cloudy days. The other morning we had a dusting, but it was gone by 10 a.m. The weather never stops German nationals, though. They have a saying, "The weather is never poor, YOU'RE just poorly dressed." Really what this means is that if they waited for fair weather to participate in life, they'd never do anything.

So, this afternoon, when my big picture window glowed orange with a breathtaking sunset, all I could do was watch. Don't you love when nature leaves you speechless? Couple the clouds with such short days, and you understand we do a lot of darkness here. We do grey. Our neightborhood street lights don't go out till 8:30 or so. To have a glimpse of the moon or a starry night is a treat for this family.

A simple miracle it was, watching a black and white world wash over in color, and I stood with my mouth agape, enjoying His handiwork. The bandit clouds rushed in to steal my show before I could get out the camera. Never fear, dear one, I want to give you a taste of the sun to prove it does still work.....and maybe to just warm up my own soul.

Still counting His gifts....

19. a surpise delicate Christmas ornament I will treasure

20. homemade pizza crust from a fabulous 9 year old

21. a magazine subscription renewal that brings home to my fingertips

22. orange sunset streaming though my window

23. candles that warm up a room

24. cut out snowflakes that wiggle from the ceiling

25. a collage gift from a local artist of all the 'biggies' we've visited on our European tour

26. my friend, my camera

27. my pink fuzzy Crocs

1000 Joys in 2012

2012-01-06T07:59:00.000+01:00

I thought about naming this post "Beginning the Year of Endings". Been thinking a lot about what this year destines to bring. It overwhelms. The end of a 2 1/2 year assignment. Endless goodbyes. Wrapping up 12 years of school at home for my firstborn. Moving across the ocean. So many endings.

I finished, yesterday, my Read the Bible Through in a Year commitment. I got behind during the last couple months. Sprinted over the last week to get it done....on January 5. Rivaling sentiments filled my heart yesterday. A little accomplishment. A little failure. A little grace. Even a little loss. I really wanted to finish by the end of the year. Various issues interrupted including illness, but, as usual, I came up short. He whispered, "You'll always come up short, child. My job is to wrap you in grace and carry you the rest of the way."

In finishing this goal, a big empty hole suddenly appeared. What will my focus be now? I can envision my life overtaking me if I'm not prepared. Plans, tasks, worries loom monumental even as I only see dim shadows of them.

Then I found Ann's words today, giving it to me, plain and simple. This year I must consciously strive to find the joy. Daily. Record them. Ponder them. Wanna come along with me?

We begin again. Counting His endless gifts, from the author of new beginnings.

1. privilege to live in Europe for a time

2. my husband who dotes

3. words of power

4. a reliable car these days on the autobahn

5. German antiques found in a friend's garage

6. amazing Christmas morning cinnamon rolls

7. "You is kind."

8. "You is smart."

9. "You is important."

10. memories of cuddling on my couch and loveseat that won't be moving with us

11. new solid German dining set

12. the warmth of my old, blue, fleece night shirt

13. Approaching God by Steve Brown

14. photo collages of a lifetime of memories

15. first dusting of snow

and that brings us to today's treasure hunt.........

16. a new Kindle

17. military healthcare

18. tenderness for young AF spouses just beginning

2011: A Collage

2011-12-29T13:48:00.001+01:00

There it is......again.

Sneaking up on me. Growing larger with each passing day, moment. (Insert the Jaws theme here...baaaa dum.....)

2012. 2012. 2012

Its shadow peaks just around the corner. It brings with it suitcases and moving boxes and my first chicklet flying the coop.

Honestly, do you think acceptance of a new year has become more difficult since we don't really write checks anymore? We don't have many chances to drill reality into our heads by writing the year out over and over.... I have no clue where this year went. Or maybe our family has such big changes in store for 2012, that I may just be in denial altogether.

So, since, once again, I haven't managed to publish a Christmas letter and shoot it to you, I am using the digital tools at my handy dandy computer to love you from across the airwaves.

So here we go......

THE BLESSINGS OF 2011

We began 2011 with a ton of snow. TON!! Literally. I needed to add these for my Texas peeps who rarely see such.

As I went through our year in pictures, I am amazed at the travel opportunites we were afforded, just this year!!!! So here are just a few memories, including: Rome, Pisa, Cinque Terra, Amsterdam, Munich, Dachau, Rothenburg, Bruges, and Nurnberg. We also played tour guide to my brother's family and visited Koblenz, Cologne, Bastogne, Foy and Trier. Whew!

TRAVEL

GROWING KINDER
(Kinder - with a short 'i' - the German word for kiddos)
Lenae is a senior this year. Did I just say that? I'm just not ready for this to happen. Her love of all things living continues to thrive, as well as her joy of mucking out her days in a smelly barn. Most importantly, her heart shines with the One who created her. We travelled to Texas A&M in November where she was finally able to envision for herself a school filled with students sharing the same passion. It was like coming home for her. On top of our family travels, she and David spent a life-changing week ministering to the Romanian people this summer.

David is a sophomore this year and yep, he's done it.......outgrown the dad. His 6'2" frame continues to grow, as does his character. He played basketball in the spring with the Bitburg boys team and both he and Lenae spent the summer working at Büchel AB serving our airmen with the force support flight. Then, in the fall, he returned to our Deutsch vintner family to help with the grape harvest for a couple of weeks.

Janie joined the teenage ranks in September with that momentous 13th birthday. She may have actually grown the most this year as she's nose to nose with me, and taller than Lenae. She competed in her first Deutsch horse show in May and we were sooooo proud. It's one thing to know enough to compete and only worry about you and your horse. Now throw in a foreign language. Yea. She remains our 'self disciplining' child and we're so lucky to get to watch her blossom this year.

Claire played basketball in early spring, and then began riding lessons for herself. She will celebrate her 10th birthday the end of January and the mama is a little misty about having no more offspring in single digits. Claire surprises with her powers of observation, noticing details unseen by others. Her tender heart still strives to rid the world of injustice.

AN EXTRA YEAR IN EUROPE

A strange turn of events (mainly my children's prayers) led us to be gifted with yet another year here in Germany. Although Rick will be finished with command in February, we will be headed to Barksdale AFB in Shreveport in May. Living in Germany and experiencing European culture can only be called a dream come true. Yet we are anxious to be near family and have our kiddos get to know their grandparents again.

So from Allen Haus to you, we wish you 'Guten Rutsch'!!!! This is an old Yiddish term used here in Deutschland meaning a 'good slide' into 2012!!! May His never ending blessings be showered on your family in this New Year!!!

XOXOXO

Rick and Della

Lenae, David, Janie and Claire

Christmas in Bruges

2011-12-27T10:20:00.003+01:00

Oh how I wish America could taste the joy unwrapped in European Christmas markets. Old world simplicity still abounds in the season. Christ is still the center. Carols celebrating His birth still resonate in angelic song as we walk along enjoying the twinkly sights and tastes of it all.

The cold, eternally gray skies are warmed at night by celebration lights of the season. We bask in them all. Soaking in all of it as next year we will be back in the states.

Lord, imprint all these moments in my heart.

Weren't We Just Here?

2011-12-12T11:18:00.001+01:00

Wasn't it two weeks ago that we were cutting a tree for 2010?

Weird.

A family event it is, the business of cutting the Christmas tree. This year there was no tromping through snow. We're still hopeful.

They've grown so much this year, this being the last Christmas with all four under our wings. We've seen even more of the world. Learned more about ourselves. Readied the oldest to sprout wings of her own.

Funny that the Christmas tree hunt is the same in Germany as in the U.S.. Now with all of them older, they seem to see the value in having all of us together. THAT is the real goal for the day, yet disquised as a treasure hunt.

Next Christmas we will have begun a new era. We will be celebrating back in our homeland, with the oldest having begun college, the boy driving, and the third in high school.!!!!!! Ready or not MOM, they're growing up!! We look forward to all the changes the Lord has in store this year.

Frohe Weihnachten!!!!

The Quiet of Christmas

2011-12-07T15:37:00.001+01:00

Today I'm struggling with the jetlag monster. Coffee is my friend.

We returned a few days ago from a month-long adventure back to Texas to check on my recovering Mama and take the oldest offspring to visit her university of choice. (My mother is a poster child of the power of prayer as she fell on concrete 2 months ago and is making miraculous progress with a significant brain injury. My sister has selflessly instituted herself "keeper of the parental units". She promptly moved in, and has been monitoring everything from doctors and rehab therapists to prescriptions and Jeopardy schedules since the day of the accident. )

Traveling with the four chicklets within the Space-A system makes for interesting tales and painful lessons in waiting. We finally got out a week of so before Thanksgiving and returned home Sunday.
The trip forced me to reacquaint myself with holiday hustle and bustle and really just crowds in general. They were everywhere and always seemed to be in my way. Likewise, American TV bulged with endless commercialism during this festive time. I'd forgotten. Even just the pace of life was more harried and stressful than life in my peaceful German hamlet. Screaming from across the airwaves came demands of what I must do, must buy or must wear . And, I guess, when a body is submerged in such noise, it quickly becomes numb to it. Coming back to it all, the obnoxious advertisements were just that....loud and irritating. The words "tis the season" take on a hue of "oh well" as we get jostled around the cash register. Sights and sounds of JOY fight for my attention.

What have we done to this season? How did buying THINGS become the focus of a celebration of God's choice to rescue us from ourselves?

Travel back in time 2000 years to a 'season' of crowds and tax-paying and just general chaos.
The town was Bethlehem, and yes, even then, He was squeezed out.

Interesting, isn't it, that things haven't changed that much. All but a few missed that first Christmas. The ones who didn't were looking. For HIM. And they found Him in an unexpected place.
In the quiet.

In these days of bustling noise, are you looking for Him?

Grasshopper

2011-10-18T09:53:00.000+02:00

Yep. You're right. I disappeared! Thanks for hanging in there with me in my....... nothingness.....!!

It seems the last part of the summer just evaporated! As of now, we're deeply buried in our school year, this being the last one for the oldest baby. (sigh...) We've just watched the weather 'turn' as they say around this rolling German countryside, bringing mostly gray and cooler, drizzly days. And, we've been gifted a few more months to take in all the European sites, smell, eats and amazing experiences.

The last few months have been ones of trusting, and a lot of it. He (The ONE) has been chiseling away at my moldability. How bendable do you want me Lord? He's been consistently drilling into me HIM, His power, His infinite awesomeness, softly giving whispers of reassurance. More stories on these to come.

One day in August, the fam took a bike ride down along the Mosel River to bask in the ever evasive sun-glow. As we pedalled along, the youngest suddenly attracted a visitor. He rode along for a while till she noticed, and almost crashed upon doing so, a HUGE grasshopper on her handlebars. Apparently, he was happy to join in our journey, as when she stopped, he hopped onto the middle child's bike to continue on. It was a startling and comical event, with our shrieks attracting attention from others along the path.

A few days later, I was reading Isaiah 40, which I have learned to cling to this past year, and thoughts of that grasshopper came back to me.

Do you not know? Have you not heard? Has it not been declared to you from the beginning? Have you not understood from the foundations of the earth?

It is He who sits above the vault of the earth, and its inhabitants are like grasshoppers, who stretches out the heavens like a curtain and spreads them out like a tent to dwell in.

It is He who reduces rulers to nothing, who makes the judges of the earth meaningless. Scarcely have they been planted, scarcely have they been sown, scarcely has their stock taken root in the earth, But He merely blows on them, and they wither, and the storm carries them away like stubble.

"To whom then will you liken me? That I should be his equal?" says the Holy One.

Lift up your eyes on high and see who has created these stars,
The One who leads forth their host by number,
He calls them all by name; Because of the greatness of His might and the strength of His power
Not one of them is missing.

Why do you say, O Jacob, and assert, O Israel, "My way is hidden from the Lord, and the justice due me escapes the notice of my God?"

Do you not know? Have you not heard?

The Everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, does not become weary or tired. His understanding is inscrutable.
He gives strength to the weary, and to him who lacks might He increases power.

Though youths grow weary and tired, and vigorous young men stumble badly,

Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary.

The news and events back in the U.S. seem a circus on my faraway TV.
My personal joke is that I am a plate spinner in my own life circus! Overwhelming at times and full of color and excitement, my days can pull the breath right from my core. As a military, homeschooling mama, I feel like I'm living in a vacuum of unanswered questions!!! And I know in my own extended family, the times beg for answers. Unfound employment, illness, government ineptness, all loom as monsters. All the hubbub may not make sense or smell logical as they scream impending doom.

Yet I must trust, gripping tightly to Isaiah 40 and what I know of Him.

If Life is a Bowl of Cherries...........

2011-07-14T08:27:00.007+02:00

Yesterday I walked out my front door stoop and was met unexpectedly by cherry branches.....laden with their offering. And when I say cherry branches, I mean 5 or 6 foot long branches FULL of the juicy, ripe fruit balls. My neighbors had pruned these branches, 3 or 4 of them, and propped them up on my banister.

We are surrounded by several aging neighbors. They take care of us, these Deutsch friendlies. I love them. My next door neighbor lost her husband the year before we arrived. And my husband helped to carry the casket of our other next door neighbor's dear wife in the spring. They grow amazing gardens, which we've been blessed with the abundance of, and we've grown into our own 'language' that I call 'Danglish'. A little Deutsch, a little English.

We smile alot. And wave, which I've learned that Germans are not really accustomed to doing.

Frau Maas had told us to venture up into her 50 ft. cherry tree with the ladder that's stayed there for the last week. She said to pick all we want. I haven't had the time to as yet.

Today, when I happened upon our front step, I thought about that old Erma Bombeck book, If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, What am I Doing in the Pits? As I picked these gifted cherries, I smiled and surmised that yes, indeed, life could definitely be compared to cherries. Truly, it's all about what we choose to dwell on. For instance, because my personal bowl is soooooo overflowingly full, I tend to shy away from commitments and/or situations that require more 'rearranging'. This tendency is not always the best option. Do you? Do you forego the sweet cherries simply because there are pits to deal with? To spit out? Is God calling you to 'work around the seed' ?

Living in a foreign country has its ups and downs, and I've been a little homesick lately. I would really like to venture into a Walmart or maybe Old Navy, just for an hour or so. I could easily dwell on my inconveniences. We are stationed just far enough away from a main operating base where even getting gas (and not paying $8 a gallon) is a hassle. I can't go into a German grocery and pick up sour cream. Doesn't exist. Ok, yeah, my Tex-Mex family (food wise) eats a lot of sour cream.

The Lord sent me the cherries today, via my sweet neighbors. He's reminding me where my mind needs to camp. He's freely given this family a niche for a time in a land that only 50 years ago emerged from a dark and terrible place. He's bonded our family with amazing, silly, quirky memories of living in another culture for the first time. I can choose to dwell on what is unavailable, or I can choose to dwell.......to live fully.... swimming in our new treasures like schnitzel for one. Did I forget to add that the fam will undergo serious withdrawal issues from said schnitzel when we leave this place?

Today I'm savoring that sweet juiciness even as I struggle to work around the pits!!!

A Day in the Life of a Homeschool Mom

2011-07-12T11:07:00.003+02:00

We're a little behind in finishing up school. Last week was dissection week for my second Biology student. Gross. Let me just clarify to the world that I am NOT a science teacher. But somehow, so far, the Lord has been trying to teach ME by giving me scientifically minded students.

{sigh}

The Comedian rounded up his (and I quote here) "instruments of torture" to perform these grisly assignments.

The poor victims (a worm, crawfish, fish and bullfrog) were patient.

I had an appointment in town and so didn't get to witness the frog's grand performance after the other creatures. So the girl Biologist stepped up to record the deed for all posterity. I have no photos of a whole bullfrog, and it was huge, by the way, as big as this entire tray. I just have pics of a poor Mr. Frog with guts splayed all over. Whoops! The Comedian quickly surmised that it was, in fact, a Mrs. Frog as her eggs had yet to be downloaded. I think I'd be put on some 'inappropriate' list if I posted these as they are gruesome. Gross for me, but eternally interesting to the two students! But then again, I think I'm a lightweight on such matters.

Over these last 12 years, the Lord has taught ME about His wonders countless times as I snuggled up, or paraded through the woods, or coaxed seedlings on the windowsill with my kiddos.

His Grand Design still amazes and inspires. Yet sometimes He just has to drag me along to witness it.

Traveling Tuesday - Cinque Terre, Italy

2011-07-05T09:38:00.001+02:00

Want to disappear?

Need to lose yourself in a sunny, pristine village and revel in the Ligurian Coast of the Mediterranean?

Just 30 miles from Pisa, we hopped on a train to visit the Cinque Terre region of Italy.

Amazing is an inadequate adjective.

Forever we will remember this day!

Cinque Terre ( or "five lands" ) encompasses the 5 Italian seaside villages of Riomaggiore, Manarola, Cornigia, Vernazza, and Monterosso. They seem to dangle off earthen cliffs, brilliant with color. Connected to each other with hiking paths that stretch for about 8 miles, this fam found the hike a personal dare. Could we do it?

In centuries (millenia ?) past, these footpaths were the main traveling highways between these villages. It seemed to whisper an invitation.

Someone's personal vineyard and garden. Makes me wonder how long villagers have been tending tender shoots here. It was nestled in, almost as a secret.

Parts of these trails were, in fact, chiseled out of the side of the cliffs.

Of course, the hikes took way longer than it should have as we had to gaze at .........scenery like this.

Is it just me or are family smiles more prevalent when earphones and technology are left at home?

Just a few of the THOUSANDS of steps on this trail........

The stone-packed trail snaked and wove its way down steep mountainsides. I'm standing on the top part. The steps wound down and curved to my happy hubby, and then twisted down to the Comedian. Whew!

Harvest time is yet approaching in this olive tree grove. Apparently, when it's time for the olive harvest, these nets are rolled out to snatch them before hitting the ground.

We happened upon an artist who worked on the scene below....

Can you imagine the stories these walls, and boats and cliffs could tell?

Unforgettable.........

The Right Thing

2011-07-04T15:58:00.007+02:00

We found ourselves alone in the car, having an intelligent conversation about culture. The man I love (who dons a uniform every morning) and I discussed American culture and then German culture. It's happened often over these past two years, since we've been outside America. I wholly believe that one cannot fully comprehend home, till forced to exist without it.

This land in which we now dwell has 'always' been here. It's changed hands every few years, its map borders extended or contracted, and been ruled by one empire or another for eons. A definite 'birthdate' does not exist. A more modern seaming back together from the tolls of war is in fact found written in modern history, only 20 years ago. As a whole, she's has revamped herself many times over. Her citizens are survivors.

The land from where we come, where our hearts will always call home, was but an idea 235 years ago, and a far-fetched one at that. A 'notion' bubbled up from the souls of 56 men who knew the definition of courage. The ridiculous wave of gumption happened to hit these men simultaneously, and collectively, their spirits took flight and they led.

As we have traveled the the European hills and valleys these two years, we've come to learn more about the American spirit. How can that be? Sometimes learning what something is not, helps to crystallize what it is. And, let me be clear, in terms of comparing cultures, I do not speak of worth or goodness here. We are all the Creator's creations, and we travel this life with the same needs and wants no matter what continent on which we happened to be birthed. We all need sustenance, security, and love. Period. But beyond that, the American spirit is different.

The initial idea of a free and independent United States was frought with fatiguing bloodshed and death. The price of such an endeavor, I'm sure, seemed unworthy and too high at the time.......to some. But the infant embers of this 'spirit' whispered, "This is the right thing" to those willing 56. They then fanned those sparks into a raging passion. Knowing the price would be high, this passion of doing "the right thing" was born with them, and continues today.

In modern history of its short life, America's wars and battles were, more often than not, fought for or against an idea, because it was the right thing at the time.. Her military action is forged usually in defense of downtrodden countries who need a helping hand. Cost is always an afterthought. (This is not unlike any normal family's actions when tragedy strikes.) American blood is therefore spilt all over the world. Help is sent from the homeland in the form of sweat and tears as well. It seems American relief in terms of disaster is willingly given. And expected. You know what? That's ok.

The world may not understand our 'doing the right thing' all the time, because sometimes it may mean breaking a few rules. America seems to follow a Higher Calling. To some it may look like arrogance. To others it resembles power. To me it looks like leadership. And I don't speak here of its 'official leaders', because in actuality, they are not the ones leading. Instead, American citizenry are the true leaders. They, in fact, lead the elected members, and this being the brilliance of our constitution.

So today we celebrate our system and our Independence from tyrany, to break ground on a new idea,

the right idea.

The Right Thing.

The Dirt in my Life

2011-07-02T12:57:00.000+02:00

If anyone had told this city girl 20 years ago that my life with children would revolve around large hoofed animals and barns and dirt.......I would have quietly referred them to a mental specialist.

Viola!!

Welcome to my life of barns, and horses and dirt.

And I wouldn't trade it for the world.

You know, back when I had the first two babies, I remember one of the hubby's first commanders advising us on teenage girls......and horses. I was knee-deep in diapers and could only dimly visualize our family down the road. He managed a couple of them at the time, both girls and equines. His words then were, simply, that he didn't fret about the 'boy world' in the least. All their free time was spent at the barn on tasks such as feeding, riding, and yes, scooping poop. Oh was he right!!! And, granted, we haven't chosen this road for our girls. Their decision to learn and take lessons is never wasted. Tending animals of any nature teaches responsiblity and builds self-confidence. And, just recently, living in this 'dirty world' has helped my oldest see what kind of boy is best for her, one that is interested in the same things she is. I smile and watch from outside the arena, as they learn to manipulate these creatures, but in doing so, learn about themselves.

Today was The Thinker's first show. And not that I'm proud or anything, but it was in Deutsch. Just in case you forgot where we live. In a dressage show, the judges give commands, and then rate according to how well the rider (and horse) execute them. So, not only must said rider remember all the proper forms of equitation (correct hands, stirrups, straight back etc.), my American kinder must also know what command, in fact, the judge just gave.

Yep. Proud mama!!

It was also our first go 'round' with a dressage competition, as the oldest, even having trained in it, hasn't shown yet. And today, she's off somewhere in another country.

This one was just a little nervous, as you can imagine.

This is the Thinker on Hippie. I think she was smiling at me.

Our favorite trainer April shows what to look for in the show ring.

April worried that our competitor was looking a little ashen.

Trainer April is always calm .

The parental units, not so much.

She did awesome!!!! Hippie I think was strutting here with her red ribbon waving.

It thrills my heart to see the younger set opening their hearts to these creatures. And, yes, I will willingly open my car, and home, and front entryway to this powerful thing called dirt.

Traveling Tuesday - Pisa

2011-06-28T06:11:00.002+02:00

The Infamous Tower of Pisa.

It really leans. A LOT!

And they still let people tour inside to climb. This appears yet another example of things that would NEVER happen in the U.S.........too many 'what-if' lawsuits regarding structural soundness!! The construction of the bell tower was begun in 1173 on unstable marshy acreage, and its builders knew it was leaning by the third story. Over the next 800 years, various builders tried to 'correct' its imperfections by shortening its uphill side as they added each level, but to no avail. Today, it stands a full 5 meters off perpendicular. The other structures in the piazza are sinking as well.

On this particualar day of our Italian excursion, my kids were anxious to get to the beach, so we opted out of the tour and took the required photos of trying to 'right' it.

The clouds were gathering, precious sunlight disappearing, the sand beckoning.

So we made our way to the beach, wiggled into swimsuits and dipped toes into the Mediterranean.

These guys played all afternoon. You would think they were sun-starved or something.

The clouds dripped a few minutes of giant drops and the whipping winds drove away ALL the other tourists.

We were the lone holdouts.

The dad breathed.

We drank in the day.

Summer....FINALLY!!

2011-06-27T11:16:00.003+02:00

I actually had another post ready to go for today, I know, you're amazed!! Yet yesterday the sun made it's encore appearance for SUMMER 2011 and so last night we had a SUNSET!! All of you folks in the states suffering from relentless heat I'm sure feel no pity on our rainy month of 50-60 degree June days. We are ready for some summer heat!!!!! So, thought I'd share the photos from last evening.

Today, I just returned from a run in shorts and tank! Miracles happen as I haven't ventured out without a jacket for weeks!! It's always the little things, right?

251. unbelievable opportunities for teenagers

252. girls who love horses

253. friends who love our girls

254. encouraging word gifts

255. sun's warmth

256. lessons He teaches

257. kids who embrace ministry

258. time alone to recharge

"For I know the plans....."

2011-06-24T08:48:00.003+02:00

Next week I will be childless. At least during the day. My mind keeps running through what I should try to get done. Lots of chores to prepare for an early spring move, which means probably starting school early, which means being ready to begin by early August, which means finishing up this year.....like now. We're lagging behind on school since we've taken time off to travel. Traveling is education right?

Our next destination is still not set in stone. (sigh) In the meantime I scour internet realty sites, looking for the perfect next haven. I think about what will not be going back across the ocean. Tempted to just trash all our old stuff (like the sofa and love seat which are falling apart but I can't seem to cut the cord from, and the little girl bedroom pieces that they've outgrown.) We need to ditch these because, interestingly, we won't be taking back any little girls, or boys for that matter, either. (tissue please) I think I'm a little hormonal.

My oldest two leave tomorrow for their third trip to yet another country which used to be hidden behind an Iron Curtain. Who would have ever thought we would be given the chances to travel that we have. I'm so grateful. Tearily grateful. Why would I ever think that any kind of life that I could conjur up would be anything but a shadow of what HE wants to give us in this life? Why do I continually have to REMIND myself to trust Him with these biggies, when all I have to do is look back......and see. I worry about our next roof under which to put all our stuff, not to mention its location in one little speck of space......... while He's quietly given me the world.

Once again I'm reminded that I serve the GOD of details.

Traveling Tuesday - Vatican City

2011-06-21T11:47:00.002+02:00

The Vatican and St. Peter's Basilica. Home of the Pope and origin of the Catholic faith.

Did you know it is its own country? The history that has taken place, right here in this piazza, is mindblowing. Kings, rulers, both made and broken. Oh, if stones could talk!

This was the walkway OUTSIDE. We stood for a few minutes waiting to enter, struggling to take in the intricacies of the ceiling.....breathtaking......

The Pieta (which means Piety) by Michelangelo greeted us we stepped inside St. Peter's After catching my breath at what I was beholding with my own eyes, the most famous of cathedrals, I found her. I could have gazed at this work for days and not taken it all in. It is housed behind glass, so the photo is not the best and doesn't do it justice. It is incredible. I guess I can relate to Mary's tenderness as she holds her limp Son. It looks so real. You can see the veins on His feet and just feel her brokenness. Can't you just sense her thoughts as she questions the Master Plan? Don't we all? Don't we question and argue with the Master and really, we just can't see the end of the story? We aren't seated high enough to see the big picture.

These few photos of St. Peter's are just a poor substitute of being there. We tore ourselves away and ventured outside, down the street and around the corner to find the Sistine Chapel.

Ok. Here it is.

After following the maze of signs and endless, nondescript corridors, the visitor finally happens upon the Sistine Chapel.

And, compared to the grand St. Peter's, it is but a chapel in regard to size. Surprising! I had heard that photos were forbidden, but upon entering, we found a whole room full of photo-snapping tourists. Flashes and all. No one said anything (until we were about to leave), but I did turn off my flash so as not to personally contribute to the demise of this great work.

The various scenes that Michelangelo depicted are all the Biblical stories, beginning with Creation.

This has to be my favorite. God reaching for Adam. Stretching toward him. Yearning for his fellowship. And Adam is just a little nonchalant.

A little convicting.

The Comedian hams it up and I find it funny to watch people stare at the ceiling. The Dad and the oldest share a downloaded podcast explaining the history of it. The 9 Euros spent here sure beat the 150 (Euros = $225 American) we could have forked over for a tour for 6.

Hundreds of people jam into the chapel and, fittingly, no pews or chairs fill its space, I'm sure, to allow more room for bodies. All gaping overhead.

No one looks at the floor. I felt sorry for it, as it was also beautifully interesting with intricate tilework. So I thought I'd show it to you as well.

Five Years

2011-06-15T12:37:00.018+02:00

It's been said that the days pass slowly .....but the years fly!

So true.

{sniff}

Traveling Tuesday - The Ancients of Rome

2011-06-12T10:25:00.137+02:00

The Colosseum. The Roman Forum. The Circus Maximus. Pallatine Hill. In order to experience these, the imagination must be shifted into overdrive. Nix the honking cars and boisterous crowds of infinite languages, as well as the shouting street vendors being chased by Carabinieri (police). Add in the whispering shuffle of leather on cobblestone and the faint rumbling of caged, wild animals yearning for dinner.

Imagine a floor/covering here on the bottom of the Colosseum, hiding all the corridors below. Thus it becomes an arena much like the modern day version. The Colosseum was the cultural center of Ancient Rome. It was the 'downtown movie theater' when Rome ruled the world. Masses were seated according to 'rank', with women being the 'least of these'. Gladiators (usually prisoners) fought wild animals for entertainment. Blood thirsty endeavors. Funny how violence has always attracted audiences, even from the beginning of time.

Why is the Colosseum full of holes?

Good question! The original structure was built and held together with 300 tons of iron clamps. All well and good till Rome fell, the Middle Ages happened, and Rome needed metal for weapons. Someone remembered the 'hidden treasure' within the walls of the Colosseum. Yes, it was savagely violated by its own.

Over the years, the Roman Forum (just down the block from the Colosseum) has taken more of a hit than the Colosseum. The governmental mecca of world power is mostly in ruins now, with only a smathering of columns surviving.

But the jaw-dropping craftsmanship! Stone monuments meant to last forever are true to their purpose. A little sad, too, that probably nothing this noteworthy will ever be built again. Costs seem always to trump the effort.

This is the Arch of Constantine, who, by the way, has quickly become one of my fave historical figures. It sits just outside the Colosseum on your way to Pallatine Hill. It was erected to commemorate Constantine's victory over Maxentius at the Battle of Milvian Bridge on October 28, 312.

Italian culture fascinated me while visiting. I wonder what it's like 'growing up' under the shadow of the greatest power in history. They, today, are tasked with being the caretakers of the 'evidence'. And, according to our bicycle tour guide (an archeology doctoral student), the sheer volume of Rome's past 'greatness' is overwhelming.

Can you think of anything in America that was built just for the sheer beauty in gazing upon it?

Traveling Tuesday - Rome

2011-06-09T12:15:00.136+02:00

Amazing Rome!

Can't believe we got to experience it! And believe me, there were loads of 'experiences' to be had! I wish I could describe how different Italian culture is from Germany. History spanning eons. Gorgeous sunshine. Bruschetta available anywhere. No time tables. (And this includes all public transporation.) If you happen to be sitting on a Mediterranean beach soaking up the sun, this would be fine. Not if you need a bus to complete your site seeing for the day. Ha! For this family, this trip was a lesson in flexiblity. And can't we always use just a little more of that?

We, again, took a bike tour, and this time were gifted with an archeological doctoral student for a tour guide!! How can you beat that? He, and the city for that matter, seemed overwhelmed at the sheer amount of excavating that is required whenever something new is built. Building anything new here requires double the time and expense because just digging, anywhere, requires archeological help in case they happen upon a find, which, I'm told, is the norm.

Tiber River

Trevi Fountain

It is said that the act of tossing a coin into the Trevi Fountain over your left shoulder ensures your return trip to Rome sometime in your lifetime. The fountain was a little richer after all 6 of us made our wishes.

Pantheon

The care and detail of architecture thousands of years old astounds me. But so did the quiet village streets, with open air cafes.

I had to include this photo. Just around the corner from our rental was the neighborhood market. About the size of a convenience store in the U.S., it was hardly the mecca of choices for anything. I think they had one or two kinds of paper towels. So seeing this incredible selection of OLIVE OIL was amazing.

My favorite! I think I had Bruschetta every meal.......mmmmmm......

Italian gelato.........the REAL reason we made the trip (sssshhhhhh....don't tell anyone......)

Looking for the Right Door

2011-06-06T20:20:00.003+02:00

Just returned from a fabulous Italian getaway. Italy was...............different. Incredible that a 1-1/2 hour plane ride can land you in a COMPLETELY different culture. The Italian (shall we say) relaxed way of life, in my opinion, is the alter ego of structured and regimented life here in Germany. Like night and day. And really, American culture is a happy medium between the two. More details to come in tomorrow's Traveling Tuesday.

I took photo after photo of ancient ruins and quiet Italian village streets. Love them! We visited little neighborhoods not frequented often by tourists. We spent endless hours looking at a map, waiting for buses or trains or subways. Some of which never showed up at all. (Public transportation strikes apparently happen all the time in Italy.) Frustration emerged often when our plans were thwarted by unforeseen circumstances. As I think back though, the trip itself was just one microcosm of everyday life. Questions bubble to the surface. How flexible are we really? A military family's life is one of changing plans and just change in general. We are forced to constantly look again at the map, always alert to the street signs pointing our direction. We look for the right door. The one that He's leading us through. And more often than not, it doesn't look like what we thought it would.

Toward the end of our trip, we were rudely interrupted (via blackberry email) with news of our probable next assignment. Nothing like being violently sucked back into the military world of planning for a PCS move and boxes from the surf and sand on a Mediterranean beach. Our heads suddenly were atwirl with what-ifs and timetables and financial questions etc., etc. AAAAaaaagh!!! So many unknowns still. We wait on HIM to quietly lead. Looking for the right decisions for our family.

Life rarely happens like we think it will. The events usually don't line up predictably on our 'life map.' And isn't that His truth ALWAYS? Even with His birth story, it didn't happen like we all expected. Not a grand royal entrance, but instead He came amid a quiet scene in a rustic cave for stinky farm animals. Almost everyone missed it, except for those few shepherds who were looking. I'm terrified to miss HIS BEST. I don't want to miss the right door. The one He's showing us.

One sunny day, as we searched for the next gelato stop, we came upon this doorway, and the words above it caught my eye. It wasn't connected to the awe inspiring St. Peter's Basilica, or the Vatican, or the Colosseum. It just sat on a quiet backstreet. We almost missed it.

I don't know why these words were on this door. Why were they chiseled there hundreds or maybe thousands of years ago? I wish I knew the story. I just know that as we attempt to live out our own stories, Lord, I don't want to miss YOU and Your Grand Map for our family.

I'm still continuing on this gratitude journey I began some months ago. Looking for His gifts. It is from this springboard that we find the doorways to the future. I look back at the small lines on our map where He's taken us and can see and anticipate the new gifts He will share, even as we stumble to find the right door.

233. eyes to see history

234. safe travel

235. a family who loves adventure

236. precious time

237. early mornings

238. dawn in the Alps from a plane window

239. pilots who speak 4 languages

240. luggage with wheels

241. an endless Italian market olive oil aisle

242. eating Roma tomatoes in Roma

243. a back without aches

244. DAILY Italian gelato

245. outdoor cafes

Growing Season

2011-05-17T08:14:00.011+02:00

Springtime is in full swing across the German countryside.

This is rapeseed pronounced 'rahpseed'. It is known to us as canola. I tried last year to capture this fluorescent crop on camera, not realizing that its color would vanish so quickly. When it blooms, it truly is the color that it looks. NEON!

It also makes for a horrific allergy season and its pollen settles on everything overnight, especially when the rain has been so evasive!!!

The Eifel region's secret treasure is also coming along nicely! The Mosel River valley is home to some of the best Rieslings in the world.

I know that the Lord surveys our lives to look at our own 'growing seasons'. He knows planting and cultivating is difficult, exhausting work. Raising little ones, tending a career, managing a family, all seem endless and thankless at times. I must trust that my tasking right now, is, truly, but a season. I've heard it said that when we have children, it's much like we are given a packet of seeds, only the seed package has no label. We have no idea upon opening the gift of a life, how to make it grow and thrive. Here's the kicker. Every child, or seed, is unique, requiring different 'tending' from the gardener. Just when they seem perfectly watered, and turned toward the ~~sun~~ Son, irritating weeds sprout from out of nowhere.

Lately I've been pulling a lot of weeds. My back hurts.

I know, I know. 'Tis but a season........

Protecting Innocence

2011-05-16T12:33:00.003+02:00

Little girls need to be little girls longer. They need to laugh and play and be silly. I want them to LONG to laugh and play and run engulfed in silliness. This world tries to pull rank and go behind my back, under my table, to take them. How does the mama keep them from being drawn into a cultural facade of lies? Struggling with that one. Almost makes the mama need to arm herself. Seriously.

How do I shelter and protect yet still infuse confidence and relevance in this crazy messed up world?

Ahhhh.....The question of the ages.

Modern society seeks to devour, chew up, spit out the souls of these innocents. It offers sexy, shiny gifts from the grown-up world.

Makes the mama prepare for battle.

The natural, harsh realities of life on this planet will find them soon enough.

For now,

they will play.

229. kids who love Jesus

230. Godly friends for those kids

231. super counselors

232. our German nest

233. His healing redemptive work

234. family time

235. opportunities to travel

Randomness

2011-05-11T10:28:00.003+02:00

This is proof I haven't disappeared from the blogosphere!

I've been having some fun with photo editing.

Thought I'd share some randomness that is my life.

I love these guys!

It's Official....I've Lost My Mind

2011-05-03T13:00:00.009+02:00

If someone finds my long lost brain somewhere in Europe, I'd be tickled pink to have it back. I'm in Germany.

I've been thinking for awhile now that the dreaded menopause years were fast approaching. I know what you're thinking, you sweetheart you. I cannot possibly be old enough to be embarking on THAT journey! I think I am. All the signs are there. And without getting too morbid and unseemly, the physical symptoms have surfaced. Night sweats, insomnia, things that once were regular are now not. I am possibly one of the most laid back people I know. I'm a 'go with the flow' type. BUT, I think several times over the last few days I actually bared my teeth at my offspring. Grouchy would be a kind definition. Yikes! I'm having great difficulty with "keeping it all together".

But no one warned me about my brain being left back in my 30's.

I think today put me over the edge. I got everyone up from our usual morning homeschool routine to go to long overdue dental cleanings. I'd made an appointment with a new German dentist for all 5 of us over a month ago. We rushed around to be out of the house this morning by 8:30.

[Need to just insert here: Germans as a general rule are an extremely punctual, exacting people. Tardiness is not acceptable to them. I took great care to have all of us there EARLY to represent my nation of origin. It's difficult enough to show up with my 'herd' so to speak. NO ONE has more than 2 children here. Oops, I have met one family that has 3 little girls. They are the exception. We get a lot of stares when all 6 of us travel or shop together. Neither do Germans rush around in a harried manner. (If they rush, it is because of poor planning.) So arriving at a commitment early to calmly accomodate paperwork for ALL of us was my goal.]

We traveled down the autobahn to the main street of another village. The address was not on the building, so I went in alone to make sure this was indeed the place. I know 'arzt' is the word for doctor, which was buried in another bigger word on the door. However, I did not find listed the particular dentist that I'd made an appointment with. I'm so glad I went in alone, for I then discovered that our appointents were for TOMORROW. What is wrong with me? I knew they were for the 4th. I made them for a Wednesday because that is our SLOW day.

Let me just add here that when the receptionist told me that my appointments were for tomorrow, I calmly replied, "Ah yes! Of course they are!"

LOST: One middle-aged FEMALE brain

Please return soon! My family needs it!

Traveling Tuesday - Amsterdam

2011-04-26T11:03:00.007+02:00

Windmills. Tulips. Canals. Bikes.

Traveling in Europe has helped me to understand that each city has a 'feel' of its own. Amsterdam is no different. We've found that taking bike tours of various cities saves time as well as our feet, and is just plain more fun. It also allows a more hands-on approach to learning a city's personality that cannot be achieved through a bus window. EVERYONE in Holland, I do believe, has a bike. The whole country is connected with biker highways. Even in the city, biker thoroughfares are beside the main street. And, NO ONE wears a helmet. This was JUST ONE 'parking lot' outside the train station.

I booked a tour for the fam with the goal of staying OUT of the Red Light District, which just happens to be down in the older, historic, picturesque area. For those that don't know, prostitution, and marijuana for that matter, are legal here. Both of these are proudly advertised everywhere, from postcards to t-shirts. Luckily, my kinder were not too focused on details and really didn't pick up on too many 'sights' or smells.

This trip ruined me for beautiful flowers!! Can you imagine 3.50 Euros (about $5) for a big bunch of amazing tulips?

Here are a few street shops, including your average 'herring stand'. These are all over! I'm thinking the Dutch aren't big fans of hot dogs!

Keukenhof Park was begun as a 'showplace' literally for the major tulip growers in Holland. Later it was opened to the public. These pictures don't begin to do justice to the amazing flowers here. Acres and acres and acres (20,000 hectares) of every kind of tulip you can imagine. Wish I could've bottled the aroma to bring home!

This area grows 70% of the world's tulips, a 600 million Euro (or roughly $1 Billion American) industry.

What a grand way to spend a few warm, spring days!

April: The Month of the Military Child

2011-04-15T16:59:00.054+02:00

I spent all my 'growing up days' in one town, suburbia at its finest. The same group of friends followed each other throughout our Texas school days. We led a sheltered life. Secure, even in an eternally warm climate. I never dreamed I'd grow up and marry a career military man and rear my children in multiple states usually having snow drifts in our various backyards.

My children don't talk "lak me". Once when they were little, and I was 'home' for a visit with the parents, I met an old friend at a playground so our kids could play. She promptly informed me that my offspring "talked funny". In other words, they didn't, and don't have, accents that give away where they were raised. They do, however, possess a curious knack for imitating my Texas twang. They've lived in many states, on opposite sides of this great country, and now even in Europe. They've seen lands and history of which many only dream, and their Facebook friends don't all post in English.

But, they also know what it means to pack up. Furniture. Their rooms. Their memories. Again and again. They know what it means to pitch in, without being asked, because Mom and Dad need to attend another function, dinner, ceremony, hospital room. The term 'family' means more than just blood to them. Family means those whose lives we've shared for a time and still remain part of our 'bigger circle'. It means those relationships that time and distance don't rip apart. These folks mean the world to this family.

My youngest is 9 and has never known a world without a war waging in the Middle East. Our ultrasound appointment, the exciting one when we discovered she was a girl, occurred on September 11, 2001. Several days later the oldest screamed and ran terrified on the playgound when she saw fighter jets protecting us over Colorado Springs. In those early days after the Towers fell, we'd talked about how all planes everywhere had been grounded. Then her 7 year old eyes saw our own jets in the heavens and thought they came to attack us. The last 10 years have required the most from military kids. Some don't know what it's like to live a complete year with dad or mom at home. Hard to fathom. These fragile, yet invincible souls, know the ache of worry of deployment, even if masked with the need to take care of the home front, and support the parent left behind. Ten years.

My mother tells stories of her own sacrifices as a child during World War II. Proud Americans gave up back then for the war effort, willingly, and with a smile. They did without......coffee, butter, tin foil.....to support the troops. Even though the current country at large has lived with the concept of being 'at war' these last 10 years, the 'average Joe' hasn't been asked to contribute personally, except, of course, tax dollars. No one has had to sacrifice....anything. Our lives have remained comfortable, other than having to watch the news of casualties on CNN. Amenities are plentiful. We are not asked to sacrifice. That is, everyone BUT the military child. For 10 years, these children have given up bithdays, holidays, vacations, sports games, bedside prayers with a parent. And some, God bless them, have given up the loved ones themselves. And they weren't asked if they wanted to.

April is the Month of the Military Child. (Ironically, somehow last week that did not matter to Congress.) We look down the road of these children and families who have given a decade of worry for these war efforts. What will their adulthoods render? In a country known for it's excesses, these are the ones who understand about giving up for the greater good, who understand that they can't have everything, who will never take for granted the presence of loved ones, who know that 'things' will never fill the void left from a missing personal hug, who understand that individual freedom is worth fighting for. . In another 20 years, these children, who know and value the true heroism inbedded deep in a parent who serves, will be our leaders.

First Deutsch Horseshow

2011-04-11T10:00:00.012+02:00

New white jodhpurs. Check.

New leather boots.......(last pair ever...). Check.

New green show jacket from Amazon. Check.

Velvet helmet. Check.

Worries of whether Dad's Mercedes sedan can pull a double trailer. Check.

Clean, shiny tack. Check.

Clean, shiny horses. Check.

Breathtaking backdrop behind the practice arena.

Major hurdle jumped today. Along with the jumps on the parcours. The oldest competed with Deutsch nationals in her first show here. And the parental units beamed with pride.

Let me back up a bit. When we downsized our lives to come to Europe, we sold a 1-ton Ford diesel pickup and a Chevy Suburban, you know, big machines made to tow anything.......Not exactly welcome rides on the twisty-windy, tiny German village roads. We arrived across the pond and found that people still tow things over here, just with wee-little cars. Europeans (who pay around $8 or so for a gallon of gas) don't do big cars. Somehow, though, sedans pulling big horse trailers is extremely comical. We joined their ranks today with Dad's Mercedes dragging along 2 horses. Can't resist the irony.

The Biologist's nerves had been exposed and raw for a week. Could she compete? I counted around 30 or so other competitors on the board above. They were crossed off as they took their turns, so the others in the practice ring could keep tabs on when their turns came up. Also, the riders themselves weren't given numbers (unlike the U.S.) Instead, the horses were numbered.

She did great! Shows are judged differently than U.S. shows. They seem to be looking intensely at the "in-between the jumps" precision. (If you speak jumping or dressage-ese, I 'm talking leads and lead changes here.) I think she was more worried about remembering to 'salute' to the judges and the order of the course.

The show itself was held at a Reiterpension (hotel and stable where your horse can stay as well) about an hour away. The breathtaking drive as the sun rose over the horizon made up for rising at dark-thirty. Apparently these are big operations over here. This one even had a restaurant and bar overlooking the arena. My favorite European contraption was this huge sun lamp, I'm assuming to warm up the equine competitors during the winter months.

It has been amazing to watch this last year and a half, this girl take her passion to another country, learn the new Deutsch words and customs for her sport. She has worked and worked, and now she is up to competition level again.
Mama is proud! What a great day!

208. the warmest day yet

209. a morning bursting with flowers

210. a clean car

211. a man who puts us first

212. dependable horses

213. new German friends

214. early mornings

215. gleaming sunrises

216. a European car that tows

217. kids with passions

Walking in the Mist

2011-04-08T08:29:00.004+02:00

I'm loving the sunshine that recent days have gifted me. This morning I took the doggie out for our morning wandering and was caught breathless at the cloud I found nestled on the horizon. If you've seen the movie Pride and Prejudice, did you take note of the landscape during the 'turning point scene' as Mr. Darcy walked toward Elizabeth in the foggy mist? Mornings here in Germany often appear similarly. Actually, I've seen the mist fall at all times of the day in the rolling hills I meander. A cloud of sorts will just settle, somewhere. This morning I was captivated. The sun hurried to burn it off, but not before I could snap a shot or two. Interestingly, behind me, the way was perfectly clear.

The misty fog seems to have settled over our family as well. Not exactly sure what the future looks like. We are at a crossroads of sorts. The view is a little cloudy. Career choices. College choices. Anxiety. Spent the morning with the oldest - calming nerves. Reassuring. Spring of her high school junior year uncovers fears that have masked themselves all these 17 years. The future is just right there. Close enough to touch, yet vague and unclear. She knows a direction she'd like to travel, somewhat. We look at the classes she needs to wrap up her education under my tutelage. Can it be?

I've got her here for only one more year. Safe, under my big old wing span. Isn't every parent walking a tightrope of sorts? Pulling the kinder along, cheering them on. Feeling our way through the mist, unsure ourselves of where we're going? Especially the homeschool mamas who fight the insecurities telling us we can't do this. We can't..............alone. But we hold on tight to the One who's leading us through the cloudy ~~daze~~ days. All we can see is what's directly in front of us. We trust His gentle voice to lead us both in the mist. But isn't this where we're supposed to live? Must we really see so far ahead? Shouldn't we be in the only moment that's ours? Right here. Right now?

So I teach her how to inch her way from the now to the tomorrow. All I can do as the mama is teach her how to walk, Who's hand to hold when it's not mine. Especially in the mist. As I blindly feel my way along myself, I'm holding onto HIM, and as I do, I'm dragging her behind. Especially when the way's cloudy. The job of raising kids is to slowly edge myself out of the chain. The mama needs to make sure the girl child is holding onto Jesus to take her through the mist. With both hands. The future is ALWAYS unclear. Remember, perfect vision only comes as we look behind! Circumstances change. Disappointments come uninvited. Tragedies strike. Uncertainties abound.

My own eyes mist thinking about my limited time. Does she know all she should? Eleven years dissipate. She learns endless ways of manipulating letters and numbers and concepts but what she really needs to know is how to walk.

Traveling Tuesday - Cochem

2011-04-05T14:01:00.005+02:00

I do believe this has to be one of THE most beautiful places on earth....Just down the road a piece. Nestled gently in the Moseltal (Mosel River Valley) this quaint village boasts one of the premier wine (mostly Reisling) regions in the World. Hundreds of family owned Vintners farm their own parcels of land (above) and gift all of us with their liquid treasures. One of our fave stomping grounds, for shopping, food, watching the geese..............we love, LOVE Cochem.

Reichsburg Castle keeps watch over the village below.

Hello Yellow, Hello Spring

2011-04-04T09:15:00.004+02:00

I love that when Spring FINALLY arrives, amid both earthly and heavenly applause, it seems lit with a spotlight! VIBRANT yellow beats the other colors to the stage, and, set with the black and white and gray backdrop of the German countryside, it loves basking in newfound attention. I snapped a few photos this morning on my walk with the doggie. Enjoy!

176. leadership spouses who love

177. sunshine at 7, 8 p.m.

178. funny people

179. quiet moments

180. Your still small voice

181. brilliant sunsets in Germany

182. a God who hugs tighter

183. trusting -- the pillow of your will

184. amazing music that ministers

185. sweetness of letting go

186. protection of a jet trail in a blue sky

187. tears between friends

188. counselors who sacrifice for airmen

189. green shoots promising

190. technicolor spring

Pain and a Birth Story

2011-03-30T15:39:00.008+02:00

New shoots spring from the ground, the dreary, dull ground that has lived under the weight of rains, heavy snow, and grey skies, for eternal months. I eye them on my early morning excursions with meine hund Elijah. Colorful they are and unexpected. They encompass joy. And somehow, relief.

Recent disappointments still ache and render me hollow. Somehow I feel guilty for even questioning why. Is my faith so shallow? I'm disappointed in my own readiness to be so disappointed. Tears still spill too easily. Even with the hope of springtime emerging, the firmament dirt of my soul remains dull, empty. I don't get it, the injustices on our own path. This is the path we prayed over and believed in, lit with His Word.

I wondered today if those new innocent shoots felt the pain in journeying up through the soil. Their world in the ground is dark and hard. For months. A birthing process of sorts. They began as seeds. And they struggle toward the sun. Affected by every detail of their environment, circumstances, the weather and the temperature, help and hinder. Spring is synonymous with new life. Birthing. And birthing is synonymous with pain. Somehow the pain of childbirth is viewed, pondered, remembered differently than other pain.

Then it hit me.

What if ALL our pain was colored like this? What if we (I) viewed my hurt and anger inflicted by life's events as birthing pains. Bringing forth something bigger that God is doing. I know, I know, we hear that all the time as believers. Somehow those words ring empty when my heart is hemhorraging. Don't get me wrong.....pain is pain. It requires tears and sometimes screams. I am carried back to my own hours spent in Delivery Rooms. I birthed four whoppers, 8, 9, nearly 10 pounders. It was only with the last child that I experienced the sweetness of the epidural. And even then I was at a '9' and she was sunny-side up, making for excrutiating back pain. My very late anethesiologist calmly sauntered into the room after hours (it seemed) of me asking, screaming for him. He was much too calm. Couldn't he see I was being torn in two???? How could he not see I was teetering on the edge? BUT, he knew I wasn't . He knew what I could handle. I didn't. (He barely escaped with his life. )

The pain experienced in a delivery room is filtered. There is a REASON for it. I knew I'd come out with something, someone. A precious gift. I knew all of my distress was WORTH IT. If all we remembered about a birth experience, or even a 9-month uncomfortable pregnancy, was the pain, there would be no babies.

What if the lens through which we view our lives and situation and pain was filtered. What if we accepted the pain of disappointments and injustice as birth pains. What if my first thought when something unexpected hit was to say..... (after the crying and the screaming, which are written into our very human nature and are expected by Him).........."Hmmm..What is God doing here?".....

What if?

Let's be honest, every thought by a mama in a delivery room IS NOT about the baby to come. It's about just making it through the contraction. Moment by moment!! Likewise, when unexpected tragedy strikes, IT IS OK to scream out "WHY???????", to ask Him to explain, to cry out in agony. And, more often than not, I am surprised, knocked breathless, by this birthing process. I am one of those women who didn't know she was even pregnant till she went into labor! Shock? Disbelief? No preparation!!! Then PAIN!!!! I think most times, He does work like this. Circumstances veer and careen, doing the same for my emotions and stability, security. Nothing like a calm doctor, or Great Physician to change the mood of the delivery room. He knows me. HE KNOWS.

Often it seems, He's LATE with the spiritual epidural to take away the pain. I think too He may prefer, at times, that we should birth the old fashioned way, feeling every seering bit of it. (Can I just say, I'm not such a fan of this method?) Yet, interestingly, HE DID fashion us as women FOR the BIRTHING process. A strong breed we are. Often a topic of conversation when women gather, our birth stories (battle stories and scars) are told and shown over and over, detailing our agony, hardship, much like men comparing hunting or fishing, or war stories.

Can this be what Paul meant when he wrote these words?

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverence. Perseverence must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-3

Ok. Lord, I'm in the middle of a contraction here. I'm still breathing through it. Help me to see what you're birthing from me. I don't understand. But I trust that YOU do. I know I'll have a great story.

Spring Has Sprung

2011-03-24T16:33:00.004+01:00

This is the FOURTH day of sunshine folks!!!! Woohoo!!! We've had 60 degrees for a couple days and my girls want to go 'lay out' !!!!!

Feeling the need to ditch the black background, and 'step into the light', I have done a little bloggy spring cleaning as well. Like the new digs?

What is it about spring that makes us want to clean out, and open up? Get rid of the clutter and revamp?
The sun sheds new light on a life and helps to give fresh perspective. Also shows the dust more. The dirt. I remember my grandmother being excited about a sunny spring day because it made her want to clean. I will never again take the sun for granted after living in Europe. The blue sky. A warm breeze.

The physical human NEEDS the sun. Vitamin D is cyber shot straight from the giant fire ball to our feel good brain center. Proven fact. The moods of my 'students' change according to the evasiveness of this first miracle of creation. We love adding the option of an outdoor classroom. One of the MAJOR perks of schooling at home.

Our latitude here is actually a little north of Canada, so we begin to feel the longer days soon after Christmas! I love the light!!! We don't do the Daylight Savings clock change until this Saturday, so even more is coming,,,,,Yay!!!

Leaving now to go venture into the basement to dig the patio set out of storage.
[Dazzling smile here.]

The Spoiled Brat and Providence

2011-03-21T10:21:00.018+01:00

The week has left me reeling. Watching through spilling eyes pictures of utter devasation. Not just one country. Lives lost. Some simply washed away. Others targeted by their own rogue governments, striking them down in cold blood. The world's a stage for the drama of desperate clinging to life. The souls reach across the miles through my TV and ache for my interest, attention. Their eyes plead for help and intervention. I sit helpless, worried and anxious about my own circumstances. On my comfortable sofa with my steaming coffee. News of the future assignment not what we hoped, and so I grieve. In my clean clothes with my feet toasty.

Snug in my own coccoon, I cry out angry venom as I struggle to understand His plan for our family. What do YOU do when 'your' plans don't line up with HIS plans? I thought these WERE Your plans Lord!!! You told me so. I thought I was hearing from YOU all these long days and months and years of watching my husband sacrifice himself for the greater good. You told me it would happen. And it didn't. You told me to trust you. I did.
I set the table. I was ready for the miracle.

There's His voice again.....It embraces me. Even my balled, clenched fists.
It whispers, "Trust me..."

Right into my living room, the news brought an elderly Japanese policeman who had not been home since all the events last week. He returned to his village, or what was left of it. Cameras rolled as he saw the rubble of his home and realized that his entire family, wife, son, son's wife and children, were all gone. He sobbed. My heart crumbled to the floor.

The next soundbite showed Libyan 'rebels' dancing in the street with their rifles because the world had imposed a no-fly zone above their very heads. Protecting them from their own. Their dingy, unshaven faces lit with laughter hugging each other with the joy of discovering the gift of another day.

Then just this morning I caught a glimpse of my sweet neighbor headed down the sidewalk to the market, alone. His eyes distant as seemingly this was a new chore for him. It has been a week or so since he buried his wife in the village cemetery.

It was then that my own brattiness hit me square in the face.

I've been given so much. Probably too much. My over abundance seems a handicap when viewed through the world's eyes. A blindness? Raised in wealth by the world's standards, in a country that guarantees our freedom to seek it, are we also born blind? Living here, in a culture with a history of wars fought right here literally in their backyards, the Germans know what it is to do without, be without. Conversely, we don't know what it is to see our homeland destroyed, multiple times. For most of the world, life is hard. Why should I not expect problems and grief to visit? I am not entitled to a life without pain.

Without understanding, I cling to Him to help me make sense of the week. He who is the lover of souls and restorer of all. He has promised to redeem whatever is laid before him. He changes hearts and rebuilds lands and makes all things beautiful. I whisper Thanks again, for it is impossible to feel both bitterness and thankfulness at the same time.

122. worldwide mail

123. coffee - again

124. my bed

125. our European adventure

126. the miracle of time

127. a season to remember

128. waiting - working patience

129. opportunities to trust YOU

130. a humble, grateful husband

131. tears that cleanse

132. grace - new every morning

133. blood that covers

134. worker husband who keeps going when no one is looking

135. Your vision for my life, our life

136. Your Word -- a lifeline

137. friends who just know

138. the fact that we only have to make it through 24 hours at a time

139. friends who ask for advice

140. money to go and do
141. the FACT that You're ALWAYS good

Might He be whispering "Trust Me...." in your own ear as well?
Like an opportunity to be graced with vision from the gals of Proverbs 31 Ministries? Check out the conference happening in July in North Carolina. Ann Voskamp of A Holy Experience is blessing a blogger with a scholarship to attend. Would love to see you there!!

40 Days and Our LOVE DARE~ Family Edition

2011-03-09T12:47:00.018+01:00

Yesterday I found myself shuffling along the cobblestones trailing a casket that the man of my dreams helped to push, on a cart of sorts, to the other side of our village. I blended with the other villagers in black and listened to the priest ahead chanting "Hail Mary's" on the route from the Kirche to the Grab. Margaret lived next door. She was the one who blessed us with choke cherries last summer. And strawberries she plucked from the ground. Cancer overtook her body suddenly last week and today her husband of 30 years placed the pink roses in the gound with her.

Time. An evasive gift.

I celebrated the gift of another year on Sunday and we basked in the sun on a hike through the wood nearby. Just as the green from the earth yearns and stretches toward the sun's warmth, we long for the gift of time. Fleeting moments whiz past and young bodies mature and are gone. Too fast.

Those young bodies hoped and prayed for more time on the Deutsch countryside. More time to glean history. Experience. Travel. Not move in the oldest's senior year. Prayer answered. Time granted. The miracle witnessed. Eyes wide.

Time is a gift. Yet I can never grasp it. I take with awe the memories that carve and leave evidence. We, ~~slowly~~ with lightning speed, tick off the moments and days remaining with all 4 in the nest. I scramble to hold them, these time gifts. Oh to have one more year here! Savoring all of it.

All of us have had Lent on the brain with the celebrations of Fasching stretching far into the night, we've been enjoying a hint of spring. Fruhling. The promise of Time. And isn't that what Easter is? The Miracle, the Promise of Time? The Deutsch have certainly taught us how to celebrate.......everything. And as we move into the Lent season, thoughts of how to truly 'clean house' and prepare for the Miracle keeps creeping into my noggin.

So, today we step into the season Celebrating the Father who is unbound by Time, and the Son who blew TIME away for us, we've been searching for how to relish these moments, and to look ahead. A friend shared of her family's choice to rewire The Love Dare for her whole family. To tweak it and work on those relationships that are paramount. Those spirits who spend their days and lives together. Forty days of 40 dares. OOOOooooo!! What a concept!

What a novel way to spend the 40 days of Lent with 40 Dares of Love of, for my family.....To consciously experience more UNCONDITIONAL love, and culminating with EASTER, the celebration of the AUTHOR of Love, Even LOVE PERSONIFIED, and His redeeming the Time, SACRIFICING HIMSELF to redeem Us.

We're in.

So, today is Ash Wednesday, or Day 1 of our LOVE DARE adventure.

The first part of this dare is fairly simple. Although love is communicated in a number of ways, our words often reflect the condition of our hearts. For the next day, resolve to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative to your spouse (family) at all. If the temptation arises, choose not to say anything. It's better to hold your tongue than to say something you'll regret. ~The Love Dare

Me - A Random Glimpse

2011-02-25T08:41:00.013+01:00

I live in a land of can't talk about. My husband works in a land of military secrecy.......in a position of authority.....so that's double jeopardy for me.

There's so much I can't talk about, or blog about in my life that I'm constantly picking through information that I encounter. My brain is one big coffee filter. If, at times, my posts seem muzzled and vague, there is a plethora (love that word) of reasons why.

I can, however, talk about me. In order to let you into my world, since, after all, we are riding along on this fun-filled life-journey together, right? - here are some more random glimpses into...me....

I'm a morning person. Usually waking on my own and I love the quiet of the early hour.

I love lists, just for the joy of checking things off. So how come I'm always without one? Constantly forgetting things at the store.....

I've never encountered someone personally who 'wore the rank' of her spouse and lorded it over innocents. You hear about the terrible spouse of General (or Chief or Colonel) So-and-So who needed to get her way and pushed people out of the way, but I've never met such a woman. Even one 4-Star General's wife that I met was very real and told openly about her struggles in her son's teen years. In the same way, that brand new 2-Striper spouse tells me about her wedding and dreams for the future. We're all on this boat (or should I say plane?) together, and serving EACH OTHER is the way we make it work.

I love that I can be real with Jesus.

I love people who make me think. Irrelevant whether I actually agree with them or even 'like' them or not.

I love, LOVE being a big kid mom! God told me I'd miss the "promised land" if I quit homeschooling before high school. Ohhhhh was He so right!!!! They crack me up!

My husband and I are opposites in every way. BUT very cool how God has 'blended' us into one very sweet and tart smoothie!

I have lots and lots of acquaintances and just a few life-long deep, profound, friendships. I think this stems from being the military wife and having to uproot and replant over and over.

I like all pickles. I find it interesting that as a child I wouldn't touch sweet pickles. Now I love them.

I've been on this homeschooling roller coaster for 12 years, terrified to 'turn the first one out' and let her make her own mark. Always wondering if I've done enough, too much.....

I have an ongoing love affair with books and last year my sweet thang became my co-dependent by gifting me with a Kindle....

I love country music especially Rascal Flatts.

I'm a very slow texter.

I'm very good at Sudoku....like, really good....

I lost 2 babies through miscarriage, one of those was a ruptured tubal pregnancy and I nearly died from internal blood loss.

I'm very critical of customer service in restaurants, stores.

I'm a spelling bigot. In my view, in the age of spell check, there is no excuse for misspellings.

(By the way the Lord has really loosened me up here by moving me to Germany where the phonics rules that I know are upside down and backwards and I can't spell anything.)

I'm not really a domestic diva. I like to cook IF I've got time and an empty clean kitchen. (With a family of 6 - how often does that happen?)

I have a husband who I adore and is the most humble person I've ever met.

I don't really like to shop.........Aren't I a husband's dream? Another exception here....the Container Store and any office supply. I could spend hours just browsing...

I do love to watch people, especially in crowded places. Fascinating!

I have tile and wood floors in my German home (like most Germans). Even through they are very cold, now that I've seen the 'stuff' that gets ground into installed carpet, I will never have carpet in a home I buy.

I can easily read people and situations to discern true motives. I've learned to trust this instinct...

I'm a procrastinator........not good.

I have great difficulty spending money on things that are thrown away.....expensive garbage bags, baggies....Toilet paper tends to be that exception as I LOVE the new MEGA rolls........

I am awed by my GOD who loves me enough not to leave me this way!

Make Way for a Miracle

2011-02-23T11:04:00.013+01:00

Ever PREPARED for a miracle? WHY haven't you?

I was asked by a friend the other day why Christians don't live on the edge more often........expectant....praying boldly and waiting to see the miracles.....

Hmmmmm....

This question coupled with Lent season has me pondering long.

Having been raised in the Protestant Christian faith, I haven't made Lent an annual habit. I'm not sure I even understood it growing up. Why do some believers DO something, better yet DO WITHOUT something in preparation for Easter? The reasoning that some evangelicals shy away from the concept probably stems from the fact that we CAN'T DO anything to top what HE DID. He made the ultimate sacrifice FOR US.....for the simple reason that we could STOP DOING, or DOING WITHOUT. And just receive the Miracle!

But does that make me a complacent Believer? Do I take the MIRACLE for granted? I want to experience it FULLY! I've been hearing HIM lately about my own expectant living. Preparing my heart, my house, for a Miracle. What is a Miracle you ask? I believe a Miracle is, very simply, a personal answer to prayer. They happen all the time, all around us. I'm ashamed to say I probably miss a lot of them. The Miracle of the Resurrection and Easter is a biggie....actually the BIGGEST! How do I get ready? Get ready for them and HIM to show up?

Honestly, it begins with cleaning.

Getting rid of the cobwebs. Clearing the clutter. Taking out the trash of.......unkind words.....unresolved conflict......unread Word pages.......unloveable crabbiness. I want Him to feel welcome.....in my clean house.....And, by the way the cleaning tools to accomplish this were provided long ago. The Bible became my beacon in the darkness, to see all those cobwebs and lint. And, His transforming Blood washes clean. Perfect.

For some, the Lent season may also mean clearing out our self-made idols. You know those, the silly trophies we tend to collect and keep around everywhere. A friend's family will be giving up all electronics for Lent, or for Jesus. Whew! Could I do without Facebook or Blogger .....or chocolate...for 40 days?.... (Anything that I crave or wish for more often than I should can be an idol).....If the answer is no, maybe it's an idol, and I've learned that all idols do is clutter up and collect dust and grime. Yikes!

Why do we do all this? A little dirt never hurt anyone, right? Because I want the Whole Thing!! I want to be able to savor ALL of it!! All of Him!!! I want to make more room in my reformed, recreated heart to FULLY EXPERIENCE THE MIRACLE. It's the same reason I don't eat all day if I know I'm going to the steakhouse for dinner! I want to be hungry to FULLY EXPERIENCE THE MIRACLE!!!! I want to be ready!!!!!

Once the house is clean, I want to set the table....to be able to dine with the King! I want to have everything else in my life 'ready' for my Miracle. Live expectantly....look for His answers.....

The Lent season is merely a reminder of what's already been done for us. We clean our hearts merely for the joyous annual reminder. Readying our lives, selves for the celebration. But He's been speaking lately about my expecting miracles DAILY. Shouldn't my Everyday be His Celebration?

Is my table set Daily to dine with Him? Should part of my prayer life be to set the table........and look for His answering? The RSVP of the King.....

Even as we sit at the table, patiently waiting for our answers...and Miracles...comes Thankfulness. Gratefulness. In the words of Ann Voskamp, "Blessing always precedes the miracle." Does my heart search out, marvel at, the wealth of gifts He's already given? Am I awed by my everyday miracles? They happen moment by moment. Do I appreciate and look for the heat that comes out of my walls on a blustery day and the gas in my tank when I rush through my life? The sunshine? The rain? The laughter? And yes, the pain?

Have I bowed and thanked at my set table?

Am I ready for the Miracle? .......How often do I pray and wait for answers and only that...........wait for answers.........

Maybe I should be setting the table........ Giving Thanks....Watching out the window......being ready.........He's RSVPed.......He's COMING!

I waited patiently for the Lord;

And He inclined to me,

And heard my cry......

.....Many, O Lord my God are Your

wonderful works

Which you have done;

And Your thoughts which are toward us

Cannot be recounted to You in order;

If I would declare and speak of them,

They are more than can be numbered.

Psalm 40:1,5

Traveling Tuesday - München (Munich)

2011-02-08T11:30:00.003+01:00

Ahhh......Bavaria in September...

You can't live in Germany for any length of time and not pay a visit to Oktoberfest!!!

We were blessed with some sun during our visit last fall to this incredible picturesque city! What a ride! Everywhere you look are lederhosen und dirndls. The locals and tourists wear the traditional garb, and the big department stores had whole floors of them!! (We did outfit the family by the way!) According to der Mann (otherwise known as the Husband), lederhosen are very comfortable!

München Glockenspiel

A little cafe whose owner was after my own heart because all of the tables FACED INTO the sun. And notice that each chair comes with a cozy blanket to combat the autumn chill.

Ok. it is true that Oktoberfest is all about the beer. This is a photo from the top of the Ferris Wheel of the 'beer tents'. These are HUGE 'tents' (not really tents - more like temporary buildings) that EACH will hold 5000-7000 people at any given time. Logistically, doesn't that blow your mind? And each brewery will have their own beer cart filled with beer barrels (remember the folk song "Roll Out the Barrel" ?) pulled by very expensive draft horses. Every morning they will pull them through town and park them in front of their tents. This was the 200th Anniversary of Oktoberfest!

Incredible sites, rides, food.....in a word, I fell in love with this city!

Beautiful Girlhood

2011-02-07T20:55:00.012+01:00

Months ago, Cherry Cheeks begged to have a Spa-Themed Birthday Party.

"A what?"

" You know Mom......we could do facials and do our nails and makeup and hair...."..

"Hmmm......"

These photos bring smiles even now. The baby is 9. Whew! Where did all those years go? Sliding into the tween and teen years way too fast!

And so the mama ponders the cultural question of the ages: How do you celebrate beautiful girlhood without the slashings of perfection that pervade our current media and cut deep into innocent femininity?

Let me interject here that big birthday events are not an annual event in our household. Pulling together a birthday extavaganza after a move is difficult without knowing anyone yet.......a recurring chorus happening every two or three years for meine Kinder. That is not to say that fun is not had by all when a birthday rolls around. They've done their share of family birthday celebrations. But this night we did celebrate girlhood, and maybe the mama's difficulty with letting go of the 'single digit' years.....forever.

We've had a crazy busy two weeks, which includes on 2-day hospital stay, sports practices/games for all offspring (translation: daily driving 2+ hours roundtrip), and by Friday you have a harried mom trying to pull together a very difficult party for very excited little girls while fighting remnants of migraines that never disappear completely. Help!

Here they come to save the day!!! Two SELFLESS older sisters that (without mama's demanding them) pulled everything together, including:

* internet recipes and grocery lists for facial masks

* snack shopping lists

* house cleaning

* fun posters indicating which room was for what spa treatment (manicures, makeup, facials, etc.)

* dressing in costume as Spa Angels, complete with accents

My older girls shined tonight just as the giggly partiers. They gave willingly to make an important event come together for baby sister and the mama. They created hairstyles, makeup, facials, nails and toes for 9 and 10 year olds. And, they showed what beautiful hearts look like on the inside by underscoring that

beauty isn't really what you do, but what you are.

Thankful today for:

80. my three girls

81. giggly 9-year-olds

82. understanding husband and son who laughed along with the girls

83. great nail polish

84. a GOD who purposely made us girls and gives us each a destiny

85. the ONE who lights us from the inside

Hurry Up and Wait.....

2011-02-03T13:10:00.007+01:00

Such is the mantra of the military family. And probably any family.

We hurry through the days only to crash head first into the bed at night awash with exhaustion from our harried lives. This family's life has exploded with basketball events the last couple months. The Comedian is playing for the high school team and Cherry Cheeks is also playing for the kids' league on the base. Military events (both German and American) are always on the front burner along with our usual schoolwork and now SAT/ACT prep. I drive a lot. All the while fighting the weather, nasty flu bugs, and my own fatigue.

We've been snow free for several weeks after our record breaking winter. And last weekend brought much needed sunshine. Jumping hoorays could be heard all over the German countryside as the first glimpse of it peeked out from on high. Our backyard trees were even starting to bud..........(teeth clenching here)......And, might I add that Mr. Groundhog said we were bound for an early Spring.....(Is it all right to claim his predictions for Germany too?)

Until....the morning broke and ice fell from the heavens.....

The byways became skating rinks and nature, 'frozen' in time, could be heard saying "Whoa!!! Hold on there!! Not quite there yet everyone!!!"

Ever really looked closely at ice on trees? You can you know. We can study it. Water in any other form refuses to be studied. It's too busy. Rushing by. Floating away. Sometimes waiting is His way of giving us a piece of Himself that ordinarily we won't see.

The Lord continually teaches me about waiting. Apparently I never seem to get it right......although I do think I'm better at it now than at the beginning of our military journey. And, yes, we are still in a holding pattern as far as assignments go. Know what? There is beauty here. In this place where the circumstances cause me to pause.....ponder.

But I need to be reminded to look. Slowed down to look for the blessings.... and the wonders.

Traveling Tuesday - Deutsche Sun Stroll

2011-02-01T08:41:00.006+01:00

A weekend afternoon with sun. A rare event the last few months. Even with temps below 30 degrees, the brilliance beckons. A magnet of sorts. And we bundle and succumb to its powers. Healing effects? Possibly.

When the world is gray most of the time, suddenly leaping into technicolor rejuvenates and recharges. The day itself is a gift and my love joined me for a walk in the woods down to the next village. Savoring the moments. As we wait for some word about our time here, we take in scenery. Still amazed we are even here, giving the children the world.

Our perspectives have changed in our time here. A much larger world shrinks us as individuals, and grows Him as the Creator.

Universal White

2011-01-31T16:31:00.007+01:00

Hospital themes are universal. Filled with white....floors, clothes, painted walls. The children's ward is filled with cries and worried mama faces. Crisp white-sheeted beds are waiting.

Spent the weekend in one such room. A quiet room. And we waited for a doctor, and a viral rash to dissipate. We wonder watched the window as the white star sun emerged outside from weeks of gray. The boy and me.

White-coated doctors come to ease worry. Anxious with so many hurts to help. They dispense white wonder pills and white-toothed smiles despite language barriers.

It only takes some time WITHOUT to be brim-filled WITH thanks:

72. doctors who speak English

73. nurses who smile

74. Cortisone

75. American roommates

76. a very patient and graceful 9-year old girl who spent her birthday without Mom

77. a husband and dad who's life mission is to keep us all together and hurt-free

78. sisters who will clean his room, because they miss him

79. healthy children

Traveling Tuesday - Limbo Land

2011-01-18T12:19:00.006+01:00

It's happening again. We're in Limbo. Limbo Land. Ever hear of it? We arrived here way too soon. I don't think I'm ready to camp out here again, so I think I'll just buy a house. Maybe some land. The girls would, of course, like horses. I've been here so many times, I'm making friends with the neighbors. We're at the place in this assignment where we are anxious to 'find out' what the envelope holds. (Remember it IS Golden Globes and Oscar season......) Hidden in it is the next ~~place~~ home for this Air Force family. We should be moving this summer. Don't know where. Don't know when. Impossible to make plans for the future. No clue what continent to make them on.

For all my 'non-regs' out there, the journey TO this land that I'm speaking of generally happens unexpectedly and without actually knowing you ARE there. I think maybe we start wondering about Limbo Land when we've got a year or so left in the current assignment. Then, when the six month marker passes with no news.....BAM! You're there!!!! It's made even more interesting when the next assignment possibilities are scattered all over the globe. Impossible to plan. Really plan. We sketch notepads of differing "IF-THEN" senarios.

What can we military types do if we find ourselves in Limbo Land?

* Trust and claim once again Jeremiah 29:11......."For I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." It is truly impossible to wear out a verse!!!!

* Gain a fresh new perspective on all those boxes, still down in the basement. Stil waiting to be unpacked. Need to deal with them now. What needs to be purged?

* For my homeschooling kindred spirits - Buckle down on school while there are no outside worries and time bandits to steal us away.

* Instead of beginning the 'backing away' process too early, glean moments of memories with cherished friends. I, for one, am notorious for 'retreating' too soon from relationships, I think, in order to make goodbyes easier in the long run. All I end up with are regrets.

I often wonder about people who don't move often. How really does one live without boxes that start to grow attached to you? Some of these quiet, square friends really like watching my kiddos grow up. They wait patiently. They've been neglected for a couple years since our last ~~move~~ relationship with them. They anticipate us rekindling our little affair with them. Feed them some more packing tape. They're very loyal.

Entering Limboland again makes me also wonder about the big R in the sky.....Retirement. Our friends are slowly finding the road there......to Retirement Land. We'll get there eventually. But is Retirement Land so different from Limbo Land? Also a land of the unknown. All we know are stories told by those who made it there. There was a time when Limbo Land was thrilling, alight with the coming adventure. It still is, to a point, but with four other lives also directly affected by the envelope....sometimes it can rattle the nerves of the mama. Trust mama. Trust Him, Mama. Trust.

Plans..... to give you hope and a future..........Gifts.....from none other than the Author of Hope himself!!!!
Still counting His gifts.........

68. opportunities to trust YOU

69. Your perfect plan

70. peace that passes understanding

71. the amazing teachable moments given this family

The Pursuit

2011-01-17T13:14:00.003+01:00

He's after me again.........such JOY in being pursued....

61. green technicolor grass after a month of gray days

62. husbands who cook waffles on a Saturday morning

63. little girls who still love to play 'dress-up'

64. sun's shadows in the trees after days without sun

Remember the feeling of budding romance from years past.... the twinkle in his eye.......the giggly butterflies alight when the phone rings.....the rosy glow of the lens when you look at him.....drying and keeping the roses he gave......reading o'er and o'er the notes he wrote - meant only for you..........anticipation.........treasuring the moments.....BEING the treasure........

Having ~~been reminded~~ suddenly discovered the secret to JOY.......I'm enjoying being pursued...by none other than the ONE who knit me together nearly 44 years ago. His gifts have gone unnoticed for a time, but I'm now noticing......documenting......savoring. Where have I been?

TODAY....have you noticed the gifts in your life, the gift OF your life? Have you named them? Out loud?

Seems to me Oprah had the country doing 'thankfulness journals' a while back. But I think she was missing the purpose. It's hard to be thankful without anyone to be thankful TO. Instead, I believe each of the gifts in my life is PERSONAL. From someONE. THE One. Planned, and thought out. Just for me. Why would He do that? Because He loves me.......wants to show me....And I don't want to miss a one......I want to look for them. Anticipate.

I've just finished reading 1000 Gifts - A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are by Ann Voskamp. In a word, it's changed me. Ever wonder why throughout the Bible, God put so much emphasis on our thanksgiving, gratefulness? The obvious reason is that we should obviously be thankful, given that we owe our all to HIM.

But maybe, just maybe, my own soul is changed when I look for His gifts. Interestingly, my worries and 'problems' (sometimes only self-perceived at that) seem to vanish like the morning mist. These gifts really are that, gifts, wooing me into a deeper relationship with Him. My perspective changes when I dwell on what He's given. And maybe the fact THAT He's given. Made the effort. After all, doesn't your day turn around with a flower deliveryman at your door? Or even a surprise call from an old friend? Couldn't I at least 'make the effort' to acknowledge them?

65. offspring who say 'thank you' for driving them to an event....again....

66. unused umbrellas

67. ears to hear the boy-child's name announced as a game starter

Ann's challenged me to keep a physical, literal list. She herself began hers and wanted to see how long it took to get to 1000. I've started my own list. And, after reading the book, I see this 'list' more as HIS love letter to me....just me....

Ever look at your blessings that way? So personal, honest, amazing.....

As my sweet friend Sharon says....."Makes me feel like I'm HIS favorite...."

How do I deserve such rich gifts that touch my very soul......

Ahhhhhh....that's just it........

I don't.

They are mine 'just because He loves me'.......

The Fall

2011-01-06T14:02:00.011+01:00

I fell today. Hard.

Good intentions told me to walk the dog around the block. Like I do every morning.

Good intentions always begin the morning. Even now, the day is new. The week is new, and the year is new. All outstretched with possibilities. Unmarred with mistakes and regrets. Do you love new beginnings as I? Clean slates, blank calendar and journal pages unrecorded with my failings. Somehow along with the world, a fresh start makes me new and clean and beautiful.

Somehow on this 6th day of a new month and year and decade, I'm already behind with my good intentions. You know those, the ones that we thought we'd have time to complete over the holidays to ready ourselves, homes, offspring for this new year. I'm already feeling the pressure to 'catch up', measure up. Make up for my own blinding shortcomings, laziness, anxiety with wifehood, motherdom, friendships. Six days and I'm already imperfect again. Not that I ever wasn't, but a fresh new beginning helps me to shed extra skins of flaws.

This morning, I fell hard on some ice that had blanketed the earth during the night, made even more slick by its own melting. He always seems to be teaching me with snow. I laid there for a moment in the wet and listened to an elderly woman shouting at me in Deutsch tongue down the way. Having seen the 'incident', I'm sure she was making sure I was still breathing.

On the creeping, painful walk back to my own yard, I thought about THE Fall. In the VERY beginning. In the only PERFECTION that ever was. How many days did it take Adam and Eve to mess THAT up? They fell hard.......and OUT. Here's the thing though......HE KNEW THEY WOULD.

Just like He knows I screw up, that I did and WILL screw up. In my words, unreached goals, relationships, imperfections. And yet he still wanted to embrace me so badly, He built a bridge across all my muddy failings, fashioned from the remnants of a very bloody Cross completed to perfection by His Own. HE is the God of New Beginnings. Fresh starts. The Unexplainable Grace that breathes life, daily, moment by moment, when I fall, AGAIN and the breath of the world is knocked out of me. The One Who Gives Life is right there, pulling me aright........once more.

Christmas Treasure

2010-12-09T16:58:00.001+01:00

The year was I think 1994.

A new baby graced the house that year. Their first. The mama was busy with mamadom and the papa somehow had time to create a ceramic Nativity scene as a gift for his bride. He was in the midst of a new job and school on the side. Sanding and painting and firing took time at the base arts and crafts center. I never knew he was working on something like that.

My Christmas treasure is this. Made for me by my love!!

Fighting the Joy Bandit

2010-12-01T16:11:00.005+01:00

Here's a little known secret about me.......I'm a Scrooge. Don't tell anyone.

Christmas is already upon us again, and consequently begins my yearly struggle with the pressure to deal with all the STUFF and perceived expecations that seem to tag along with the season. Parties to be attended, goodies to be baked, throngs to be fought for more STUFF,....and by the end I'm so tired I struggle even with smiling........I should be ashamed.....

I wish Christmas could be about CLOSING all the stores, and the parties, and the cards, and the Stuff and instead, all of us, individually, bowing at the sight of a humble manger of all things, and being awed at angels singing near a stable. I for one know exactly what a stable smells like and looks like and is filled with. We should be amazed that God...GOD.......THE...GOD.......was willing.....to enter our stinky smelly world on our level, for no other reason than love itself.

Nugget of wisdom: If we allow the evil one to steal our joy, HE WILL!!! Every time!!!!

So today, I'm letting the world know that I'm fighting the joy bandit with both barrels this year!!!!!!!! To further this effort, I thought I'd give you photo evidence..........

If there is one word that encompasses Christmas in Germany......it is JOY!!! There are Christmas Markets galore, large and small, with lights and handcrafted wares and incredible food and hot mulled wine (nothing warms the being like a cup of Gluhwein)!! Of course all of these events are outside and on this night (pictures below) it was 26 degrees.....Fahrenheit......I'm sharing some photos of our first Weihnachtsmarkt (Christmas Market) of 2010 in Dudeldorf. Dudeldorf, for my history buffs out there, was made 'famous' by Gen. Patton deciding to bring tanks through the city arches. Look closely to see the scratches in the stone from Allied tanks.......

This was a handmade Creche ready for your own nativity scene figurines. Isn't it incredible?

Father Christmas himself......

This really is chestnuts roasting on an open fire...........

Then the next day the fam headed off for the Annual ~~Griswold~~ Allen Family Christmas tree hunt.....Just to give you a little history....We have tromped through and over and around mountains, in knee-high snow in various states in our great Union.....just to find that perfect tree....The kids know the drill, they've done it all their lives...And now, even in Germany.......the story continues......

Luckily, just up the road is a Weihnachtsbaum (Christmas tree) Farm. The weather is what we call Eifel Sunny!! It gets light outside.....that's about it....and that's only from about 8:30 to 4:30.....

The mist somehow just blankets it all.....leaving a peacefulness that is breathtaking......

The torch was passed in many ways this year. David did the cutting with Dad tag teaming.

Someone besides the mama took pictures.......

The BEST part, they didn't need us at all to tote it out!! How awesome is that?

Isn't that what we as parents strive for? Working ourselves out of a job?

THIS is Joy!!!!!